Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Brainwashed - still dirty

I am stricken no less than five times a week by the realization that I am humming a tune that was forced into my brain long ago by an advertisement. One major repeat offender that struck me again today is the church of jesus christ of latter-day saints. Do you remember this ad?

There were others in the series, too. I can't find a video of it right now, but if you are like me, this song has been running endlessly in the back of your mind for most of your life:

When you tell one lie, it leads to another
So you tell two lies to cover each other
Then you tell three lies and, Oh Brother,
You're in trouble up to your ears!

So you tell four lies to try to protect you
Then you tell five lies so folks won't suspect you
Then you tell six lies and you'll collect
A life filled with worries and fears

'Cause you can't remember how many lies you've told
And half the things you say aren't true
And sometime you'll slip up, you'll trip up and then
Whatever will become of you?

So you lie and lie without even trying
And each lie you tell will keep multiplying
'Till the whole wide world will know you're lying
Then you'll be
And you should!
When you lie, you're closing the door
On everything good

I never actually listened to or understood what the lyrics of these ads were getting at until I heard myself singing them when I was much older. And of course this realization came far too late for the ads to have their intended effect of guilting me into mormonism.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

A Drinking Game

On the eve of the new year, we created the best drinking game. Because it is so much fun, I want to share it with you so that you can have fun, too. You will need the following:
  1. Some form of suction-cupped-dart shooter (one for each player). We chose the Nerf Maverick because it is rad and currently $8.99 at Fred Meyer.
  2. An awesome movie. We chose Army of Darkness because it is rad and currently $7.99 at Fred Meyer.
  3. A TV that suction-cupped darts will stick to and that you aren't worried about shooting said darts at. We chose my TV because it sucks and it was there.
  4. Something to drink. We chose Sangria and Beer because we had them on hand. Champagne was added to the mix at midnight.
Once you've got everything, it's time to define the rules for the movie you've chosen. Army of Darkness is easy:

      • Shoot all Deadites
      • Shoot other justifiably "bad" guys (like the guy with the mullet)
      • Do not shoot good guys
      • DO NOT shoot Ash
You must drink when:
  • You shoot a good guy
  • You shoot Ash
  • The word Necronomicon is spoken in the movie

And that's all you need to know to get started. Reload during talky parts, have fun and don't hurt anyone.